becoming a mother- an overview

ever since i was a little girl, i have wanted to be a mother. of course i had other dreams-to be a mortician (i know, weird 5 year old dream), an archeologist that studied mummies, a professional violinist, and then a nurse(my current profession). but always, always- i wanted to have a fat sweet baby of my own!

gerson and i always planned on having babies, but we had wanted to wait a couple years after we were married to have them. much to my surprise(and despite being on the pill), i started to feel weird. i got nauseous a few weird times, and i missed that monthly visitor. then that crazy day at the end of may, when i bought a pregnancy test on a whim- and it was POSITIVE. that faint second line changed everything!

initially i was scared. scared because i knew i was on birth control that whole first month- being a nurse, i know too much. i told gerson not to get too excited, i was waiting til that first trimester was over to get really excited. we proceeded with cautious excitement.

hearing that sweet heartbeat at my 12 weeks checkup was the craziest thing---it made it more real to me. prior to that there was no evidence of that little baby other than a positive test and all kinds of nausea and vomiting.  now we could get SO excited.

my pregnancy proceeded with no real problems. we found out at 20 weeks we were having a boy (which was what i was wanting). we started to slowly prepare. i had sooo much fun decorating his room, down to the littlest details!

then, at 24 and a half weeks, the veil was lifted. my dear friend lost her precious boy at 38 weeks gestation. that happy ignorant bliss was gone.

the rest of my pregnancy went quickly, all the while praying our sweet boy would make it here, safe and sound.

at 38 1/2 weeks, our little man decided to make his arrival. the most intense 3 hours and 50 minutes(yes, i know i'm lucky) of my life. no pain meds, just me and my body bringing this baby into the world. those first few moments staring into his eyes were so surreal. he was the most perfect thing i'd ever seen, looking just like his papa.

jude daniel-6lbs, 6 oz- 19.5 inches

3 months later, i am more in love with my dark haired boy than ever.